An Interview with D.W. Marchwell

Tell us a little about yourself!
When D.W. Marchwell is not teaching future generations the wonders of science, he can usually be found hiking, writing, riding horses, trying new recipes, or searching for and lovingly restoring discarded antique furniture. A goofy and incurable romantic, D.W. admits that his stories are inspired by actual events and that he has a soft spot for those where boy not only meets boy but also turns out to be boy’s soul mate. After almost fifteen years of working his way across Canada, D.W. has finally found the perfect place to live at the foot of the Canadian Rockies. He still can’t believe how lucky he is, and, as his grandmother taught him, counts his blessings every day.


You can find D.W. here:
https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000201492307
On Twitter: @DWMarchwell1

Tell us a little about yourself!
When D.W. Marchwell is not teaching future generations the wonders of science, he can usually be found hiking, writing, riding horses, trying new recipes, or searching for and lovingly restoring discarded antique furniture. A goofy and incurable romantic, D.W. admits that his stories are inspired by actual events and that he has a soft spot for those where boy not only meets boy but also turns out to be boy’s soul mate. After almost fifteen years of working his way across Canada, D.W. has finally found the perfect place to live at the foot of the Canadian Rockies. He still can’t believe how lucky he is, and, as his grandmother taught him, counts his blessings every day.


In Thirty Things, Nate and Finn check of a list of 30 things to do before Finn turns 30. What would be on your list?
I actually only have four things left on my bucket list:
1) Sky diving
2) Meet John Grant (musician)
3) Attend a M/M convention (in order to meet so many of the people I've only ever known online)
4) Finish the very first novel I ever started


Tell us about something you've already checked off your list. Was it everything you thought it would be?
From an early age, I have always been fascinated by history and, consequently, the geography associated with certain historical figures.
One of the things I never thought I'd ever get to cross off my list was visiting and spending time in every province and territory (in Canada) and every state (in the United States), as well as every country in western Europe.
I was impressed with how welcoming most of these places were and how many free drinks and dinners I was offered simply because I was a stranger (and a "polite" Canadian). LOL


While traveling the country, Finn and Nate visit some amazing places. Where have you been that has stuck with you?
So many places! Among my favorites:
United States (Grand Canyon, all of Manhattan, Hollywood sign, all of Montana, MOMA)

Canada (Niagara Falls, Rocky Mountains, Capilano Suspension Bridge, Columbia Icefield, Polar bears in Churchill)

Europe (cathedrals, museums, monuments, Auschwitz, my ancestors farm in Austria)


If you could only do one of the things on your list, which would it be?
Finish that very first novel that I started when I was sixteen years old.


What items would be on your writing bucket list?
That first novel I started so many years ago, but can't seem to get to to finish it.


Which books are on your TBR Bucket List?
Far too many. Just about everything by AKM Miles and (mainstream) James Rollins

D.W. has a new book that just released in November, called All That Heaven Will Allow and another book coming out soon called Even The Innocent. We are lucky enough to have excerpts from both!

Jimmy Campbell has owned his own bar for the past twenty years. While his past is troubled, his present and future make life worth living. He has good friends, more than enough money, and he volunteers—along with his Yorkie, Bozo, and his Maine coon cat, Miss Alicia—at the local hospital every Friday. He couldn’t ask for more. That is, until he meets Derek “Dizzy” Roberts. 

Derek is a musician who tours the country with his band. He’s an ex-cop, was married once, and has the bitter ex-wife and two spoiled children to prove it. He's finally living his dream, and that includes bedding all the groupies who think he’s every bit as good as his music. He doesn’t worry much about the future, until he meets Jimmy. 

The two men begin a long-distance romance, sneaking weekends here and there, until a tragedy forces them to realize they might lose the only thing they both want—a future together. Now, they’re asking for everything heaven will allow.


Excerpt from All That Heaven Will Allow

Chapter TWO

Dizzy walked out of the bar, whistling that new song to himself. He’d only written it a couple of weeks ago, and this weekend’s gig would be the first chance he’d have to test it for a live crowd. And with that fine-looking man in there, Dizzy would have just the right inspiration to do the song justice.

He unlocked his SUV, climbed into the driver’s seat, and turned the key. He pulled the SUV out of the parking lot and headed the few miles down the highway to his hotel, thinking about Jimmy Campbell. He knew he was grinning because he wasn’t used to getting turned down like that. Since he’d divorced his wife almost fifteen years ago, Dizzy’s bed was hardly ever empty. Even when he was touring with his band and staying in hotel rooms, Dizzy could always count on an evening filled with the company of a handsome man, or two. But this Jimmy—he was going to require some special handling. And Dizzy was quite certain that he would definitely make it worth his while.

Although not as tall as Dizzy, Jimmy had a full head of blond hair and dazzling baby blues that got an unmistakable glint that seemed to say, “I want you, but you’re going to have to work for it.” Those were the times when Dizzy appreciated the fact that he’d always taken care of himself. Sure, he’d always worked out and eaten healthy when he was working as a cop. But now, retired from the force, the unexpected bonus to keeping fit was Dizzy’s amazing stamina. He’d have his bedmates panting and begging long before he got around to his favorite part—riding them nice and slow. And when they were screaming out his name, he’d pick up the pace—only to slow down, just to show them who was in charge. The end result was always the same: They were always very happy to see him, and he always made sure to leave them spent, sweaty, and with a huge smile on their faces.

He had a man or two in every town he’d ever played, and a very long list of telephone numbers to prove it. Dizzy had never played this town before, so he was looking forward to adding Jimmy’s name to that list. And if his usual lines didn’t work on Jimmy Campbell, then he’d just think up a few new ones, maybe dedicate a few songs to the man. Dizzy enjoyed a good challenge, and something told him that Jimmy would be worth it.

Dizzy felt the phone vibrate in his pocket and pulled over to the side of the highway. He quickly looked at the display and saw it was his ex-wife. He plastered a smile on his face, then punched the accept button and waited for the fireworks.

“Hello, Beth.”

“Braden just called me and told me the university hasn’t received the payment for this semester.”

“I’m fine, thanks for asking.”

“Derek, don’t make me get the lawyers involved, again.”

“Don’t threaten me, Beth,” Dizzy cautioned as his grip tightened on the phone. “Would you prefer fax or e-mail.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I can either fax or e-mail a copy of the check I sent to Braden over two months ago. Oh, and I can also send you proof that Kelley’s school fees were paid as well.”

“Why the fuck would you send the check to Braden?”

“Because he asked me to.”

“Jesus Christ, Derek, you do realize he’s probably spent the money already.”

“And how is that my problem? He’s an adult now.” Dizzy felt the self-satisfied smile curl his lips. He lived for these moments when Beth got her comeuppance. It was why Dizzy lived so frugally. He met all of his financial responsibilities as set out in the divorce, with military-like precision, just for these moments. “I meet all my obligations, Beth. If Braden lies to me and spends the money, that’s his problem, not mine.”

“And where’s the money going to come from for his tuition?”

“Again, not my problem.” And now for the truth. “I’m apparently nothing but the bank here, Beth. I’m not the one who spoiled them rotten and spent the last ten years telling them I’m a good-for-nothing faggot.”

“Oh, fuck you, Derek.”

“Oh, and Beth?” Dizzy didn’t wait for her to respond. “Perhaps you could tell Braden to go and get a job. Oh, perhaps that man who’s so much better than me might get off his ass and make his own goddamn money instead of living off mine. Interesting, isn’t it? You call me good-for-nothing, when the man you claim loves you more than I ever did won’t marry you because your alimony would stop.” Dizzy took the phone away from his ear and looked at the screen. He waited for the invective to begin and was only slightly surprised when Beth had nothing to offer in response. He punched the button to end the call and sighed.

I met a handsome man today, with the finest ass and longest legs I’ve ever seen and finally managed to shut Beth up. Dizzy tossed the phone onto the passenger seat, put the SUV in gear, and made a quick U-turn back to the bar. Pretty good day. He saw the bar in the distance. Let’s see if I can’t end it with those legs wrapped around my neck.

Dizzy parked his SUV and turned off the engine, pocketing his keys as he jumped out and headed for the bar. He pulled the door open and breezed in with that slight swagger to his hips that always managed to draw focus to what he was packing between his legs and show off his firm ass at the same time.

Jimmy was clearing the tables, so Dizzy just propped himself against the bar and watched those legs and that ass move effortlessly around the room. There were even fewer people there than there’d been before, but he figured that was because it was almost nine o’clock. Business probably wouldn’t pick up for another few hours.

Dizzy switched his position as he saw Jimmy head back to the bar, probably to unload the tray he was carrying. He stood with his elbows on the bar, proudly showing off that firm ass so Jimmy could get a good look at one of the many breathtaking views that would be his for the night. Dizzy watched in the mirror behind the bar as Jimmy noticed him.

“You forget something?”

“Could never forget you, darlin’.” He watched as Jimmy seemed to force a smile and started putting dirty glasses into the stainless steel sanitizer.

“What can I get you, Dizzy?”

“What’re you offering?”

“List’s right there on the wall,” Jimmy said, pointing to the wall before heading to the other end of the bar to take a couple of orders.

Dizzy took a moment to appreciate the curve of the ass where it met the small of Jimmy's back. He let his eyes travel down to take in the way the jeans hugged the man’s thighs. After Jimmy had placed two beers on the counter and the customers had disappeared back to their tables, Dizzy watched as Jimmy returned to stand near him. “I don’t see what I want on the list.”

“Let me guess,” Jimmy said, forcing a smile again. “You don’t see me up there, right?”

“No, darlin’,” Dizzy said, his voice low and husky. “I was hoping I could get a Bud.”

“That’s weird,” Jimmy said, turning and reaching into the fridge. “Bud’s the first one on the list.” He pulled out a Bud and slid it down to Dizzy. “Glass or bottle?”

“That is weird. Maybe I need glasses. Huh.” Dizzy took a mouthful of beer, swallowed, pulled the bottle away from his lips, and licked them slowly. “Bottle’s fine, darlin’. Thank you. How much?”

“On the house,” Jimmy said, as he threw the towel over his shoulder and headed back to loading the sanitizer.

“Mighty nice of you,” Dizzy said, then took another mouthful of beer as he looked around the space. “Slow night or does it pick up later?”

“About normal for a Thursday,” Jimmy said as he finished loading the sanitizer. “Busy after work, but crowds disappear around eight or so when they remember they gotta work tomorrow.”

“How about on the weekends?”

“Busier than a one-armed paper hanger,” Jimmy said, leaning against the bar. “Especially since we’ve started featuring live bands on Saturday nights.”

“You mean I’m not your first?”

“Thought you liked ’em seasoned?” Jimmy said, smiling, probably thinking he’d scored a point or two.

“Oh, I do, but there’s something to be said for new experiences. Don’t you think?”

“I guess that depends on what you think you got that I haven’t had before.”

Dizzy laughed out loud and brought the beer up to his lips again, giving him some precious seconds to think. “Well, how about you tell me what you’ve had before, and I’ll let you know if I got better.”

“You know, now I think about it, there is one thing you could do for me that I haven’t been offered in a really, really long time.”

“Anything for you, darlin’.” Dizzy felt a stirring in his pants and started planning his seduction. This wasn’t as hard as I thought it was gonna be. He leaned over the bar a little more.

“How about talking to me like a grown man and treating me like I’m not only interested in what’s in your pants?”

Dizzy’s smile disappeared almost instantly. “Hey, look, darlin’—”

“Jimmy. My name is Jimmy. Not darlin’.”

“Okay,” Dizzy said, realizing just then that the man wasn’t yelling or even frowning—he was smiling. “Listen, Jimmy, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean nothing by it. It’s just some harmless flirting.”

“You ever stop to ask yourself how much harmless flirting I gotta put up with in a place like this? You ever wonder if maybe the people who turn you down might just want a sincere conversation?”

“Don’t know. Never been turned down.” Dizzy heard the words and saw Jimmy roll his eyes. “I’m sorry. I—”

“You mind me asking you a personal question?”

Dizzy shook his head.

“How old are you?”

“Be fifty-one in two months.”

“Well, I’m forty-five. Just turned. And I’ve been out since I was eighteen. That’s twenty-seven years of listening to that kind of crap. And there’s only one thing I’m looking for right now.”

“What’s that?”

“A man. A man who knows how to be responsible. A man who wants to know more about me than just my phone number. A man who can recognize that ‘no’ might mean I’ve got some needs that don’t involve lying on my back and telling him how big he is and how no man will ever be as good.”

Dizzy watched Jimmy turn and reach into the fridge again. He pulled out another Bud and placed it on the bar. “Thank you, Jimmy.” He finished his first beer and pushed it aside. He pulled the second in front of himself and played nervously with the label.

“You’re welcome.”

“I apologize, Jimmy.” Dizzy felt his face burning slightly, as it had when he had to sit and listen to Beth and the lawyers argue over child support and visitation and betrayal. He wanted to reach out and throttle all of them, even his own lawyer, but he hadn’t because he knew that his decision to finally come out had caused almost all of the problems. And here he was again. He’d been an ass to this nice man, who still hadn’t lost his temper, and he felt like shit for doing it. “Happy belated birthday.” He held up his bottle. “Can I buy you one? Can we start over?”

“No, thank you. To the beer, I mean. I don’t drink.  Well, not on the job, anyway. But we can most definitely start again.”

Dizzy extended his hand and offered a sincere smile. “Derek Roberts. Very nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you, Derek. Jimmy Campbell.” Jimmy put his hand in Derek’s.

“Okay, then, Jimmy. I’ve got a question for you.”

“And what’s that?”

“You ever free from this place? I’d love to take you out to dinner while I’m in town.”

“Can’t do dinner, especially this weekend.”

“Okay, fair enough.” Derek took another mouthful of beer. “What time are you here on Saturday?”

“Bar’ll open at six, and your first set will be at eight.”

“No, I meant what time will you be here, ’cause I was thinking I could bring lunch by an hour or so before the band sets up. And we could get to know each other a little better.”

“I’ll be here by eleven in the morning, or so.”

“So? Two? Three?”

“I’ll be here.”

“Great,” Derek said as he pushed himself away from the bar. “Anything you don’t like to eat?”

“I’m vegan.”

“Got it. No meat.” Derek took a few steps toward the door and turned around. Jimmy was still looking at him. “It was nice talking with you, Jimmy.”

“Good night, Derek.”

He waved and walked out of the bar, feeling a little relieved. He wasn’t sure if he was relieved because he could finally put away the routine and be himself, or because he’d just made a date with the first man who’d ever called him on his bullshit. Either way Derek figured he’d found something he hadn’t had in a great many years. Derek was excited at the possibility that he’d just made a friend, a friend who would appreciate everything the real Derek had to offer.

 

Excerpt from Even The Innocent

Chapter ONE

Our brothers and sisters are there with us from the dawn

of our personal stories to the inevitable dusk. (Susan Scarf Merrell)

 

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Behr Kincaid turned to Agent Smith and glared.

“No, this isn’t a joke.”

“Fan-fucking-tastic,” Behr sighed as he looked at the ancient house that would now be his home. “If I fall through the floor or if those dogs hurt themselves, our deal is off,” he said before turning slowly to regard the agent’s tired expression. “Understood?”

“You’re welcome to back out anytime, Mr. Kincaid,” the middle-aged agent said with a grin. “I’m sure your father and brother would love to see you again.”

Behr offered a brief, sarcastic smile, pulled on the door handle, and shouldered his way out of the SUV. Everyone involved, especially Behr, was well aware that this was the end of the line. There would be no backing out, no return to his former life, and certainly no seeing his brother and father again. Not only would it mean Behr’s death, it would also mean that Dino’s death would go unpunished.

“Oh, and thanks for the new name,” Behr said. Then he slammed his door and opened one of the back doors so he could let Dino’s dogs out.

“You said you didn’t care. I suggested quite a few, but you didn’t want any of the other names,” the agent sighed, shrugging.

“Not all redheads are Irish, you know.” Behr decided to stop talking and smiled at the two beautiful German shepherds. Brother and sister. Dino had rescued them the day before they met, the day before Behr understood what it was like to meet someone for the first time and fall irreversibly, head over heels in love with a complete stranger. He’d known in an instant, just by looking in Dino’s eyes, that they would spend the rest of their lives together. Well, that had been the plan, at least. Behr sighed as he guided the dogs out of the SUV and closed the door.

“Listen,” the agent said as he exited the SUV. He went around the back of the vehicle to grab Behr’s two suitcases, deposited them next to the dogs, and handed the keys to his charge. “We’ve been over this a million times. If this is going to work, you have to remember that you are not from an Italian family, that you’re from a small town in British Columbia—Tofino, to be exact—and that you’re from an Irish Catholic family. An only child who lost his parents tragically at the age of twenty-three.”

Behr rolled his eyes and started walking to the house, worried he was going to trip over something. “And what’s with doing this in the middle of the night?”

“Fewer eyes, fewer questions.”

Behr looked at Agent Smith, expecting more to the explanation. “And you don’t think one of my new neighbors won’t ask why I moved in at two in the morning?”

“You’re not moving in at this hour,” the agent said, rubbing his temples. “You can simply tell them you arrived sooner than expected and decided to stay in the house instead of a hotel.” Behr glanced at the agent and shook his head. “It’s not unheard of. And I’m willing to bet not one of these neighbors will ask you that question.”

“And if one does?”

“I’ll take care of them.” He patted the gun hidden under his suit jacket. “Make it look like an accident.” Agent Smith shrugged and winked.

Behr laughed despite himself. He let out a heavy sigh and offered a smile. “I’m sorry, Agent Smith.”

“Kevin, please.”

“Right,” Behr said as he pushed the key into the lock. “I don’t mean to be so difficult.”

“You call this being difficult?” Agent Smith moved past Behr and entered the house first. “I’ve got twin four-year-old girls at home. You’re a lightweight compared to them. At least you’re not criticizing my French toast.”

Behr followed Kevin into the house and waited by the door, keeping the dogs close to him. “Can I turn the lights on, at least?”

“I wouldn’t,” Kevin said as he strolled casually from one huge room to the next. “Probably best just to go and get some sleep. Don’t want to draw too much attention.”

“Right,” Behr said, nodding. He watched and waited while Kevin checked all the rooms, even the upstairs.

Behr took note of each step that squeaked, already creating a mental list of all of the repairs he would need to do to this ancient Victorian house. He listened to the footfalls overhead as Kevin checked one room after another. Behr was lost in thought. Just how many rooms are in this house? Couldn’t they find anything smaller? Won’t this be conspicuous, a single man and two dogs living in a house this size?

“All set,” Kevin stated as he descended the stairs.  “And as we discussed before, keep as low a profile as possible for the time being.  No Twitter, no YouTube, no Facebook—”

“Never did those things before.” 

“Then not much adjustment needed there.”

Behr thought about asking his questions, but didn’t. “I guess this is good-bye, then.”

“I’m afraid so,” Kevin said, his hands on his hips. “I’ll be keeping an eye on you, but you won’t be able to contact me.”

“What if something goes wrong?”

“It won’t,” Kevin said with a reassuring smile. “But if something does go wrong, I’ll know it before you. And if you get a call from a bank manager by the name Kevin Smith, make sure you pick up.”

Behr didn’t have any choice but to trust him. In fact, it seemed Behr hadn’t been allowed to make a decision on his own for the past three years. “And this is the final move?”

“This is it. Your brother’s last appeal has been denied by the Supreme Court, and he’ll be spending the rest of his days in prison. He won’t be able to do much from there.  But we’ll be keeping an eye on him and his known associates.”

“Dino underestimated my brother too.” Behr crouched and hugged his dead husband’s dogs. “I’d hate to see your girls grow up without a father.” Behr studied the agent’s face and noted a mixture of apprehension and bravado he’d seen a million times before.

“I know how to take care of myself,” Kevin said and extended his hand. “There are a couple of families back in Winnipeg who owe you for giving them closure. Not to mention those of us who’ve been trying to get your brother behind bars for the better part of ten years.”

The words struck Behr as amusing, and he started to laugh as he stood. “Ten years.” He put a hand in front of his smile. “My brother is only twenty-seven years old. He’s been a criminal genius for almost half his life. He couldn’t pass middle school, but he can organize an entire criminal enterprise without getting caught.” Behr saw the look of concern—or was it disgust?—on Kevin’s face and regained his composure. “I’m sorry. I know Maurizio killed your partner.”

“It’s okay. I can’t imagine how difficult this has been for you.”

“You want to know what’s really pathetic? I knew what he was doing. How could I not? But it wasn’t until he killed Dino that I did anything about it.” Behr felt the heat behind his eyes and looked down. “He killed those two teenagers, and I didn’t care as long as he left me alone.”

“What your brother did was not your fault. Even if you’d had any evidence that your brother killed those two boys, Maurizio could have just as easily killed you that night as well.”

“At Dino’s funeral, Maurizio was suddenly willing to bury the hatchet, to forgive me for everything I’d done to him. That’s when I knew. I knew he’d had something to do with Dino’s murder.” Behr squatted to comfort the dogs and realized it was they who offered comfort instead. “I was going to get the truth out of him, one way or the other.”

“Listen,” Kevin said, placing a reassuring hand on Behr’s shoulder. “Take the pups upstairs. Get some sleep. I made sure that the bedroom has some temporary furniture. Tomorrow or the next day, the movers will arrive, and a whole new life will begin.” Kevin extended his hand. “Oh, and there’s an SUV in the garage, registered in your new name.”

The two men shook hands, and Behr followed the agent out the front door, neither of them speaking. When Kevin drove out of sight, Behr sat down on the front step of the darkened house, one dog on each side of him.

“Well, what do you think?” Behr ruffled their fur and smiled at each of them. “First thing tomorrow we’ll go out and see the backyard? Maybe go for a nice long walk?” The dogs licked his face several times, and he laughed.

He got the dogs settled upstairs in the master bedroom and then took a quick tour of the rest of the house, being sure to note that there was at least some food for him and the dogs in the kitchen.

Behr took one final detour to check that the basement would lend itself perfectly to his plan and confirmed that it would—with minimal changes. Then he headed to the master bedroom, wondering if the complete lack of noise would help him sleep or keep him awake agonizing over every decision he’d ever made.

His last conscious thought was that he would need to find a vet for Charlie and Lucy. He was worried about them. They seemed thinner. And he would need to make sure he kept his mouth shut. Even if the vet was wrong about something, Behr would never be able to let on that he knew anything at all about veterinary medicine.

 

 

Behr looked at the clock. It was not even six o’clock yet, and despite it being daylight savings time and the end of June, there was no sign of the sun on the horizon. He was in a strange town, in a house that was his but strange, nonetheless, and alone in a new bed staring at the ceiling. He reached beside him to see if Charlie and Lucy had made their usual clandestine, middle-of-the-night jump to the bed, and was not disappointed. They were there, as they always had been since he lost Dino.

Dino was always a bit of a disciplinarian with Charlie and Lucy, but Behr had never had the heart to scold them too much. Where Dino would shoo them off the bed as soon as they jumped up, Behr always found himself either scrambling to get them off the bed or getting caught red-handed with the two dogs cuddled up beside him. When Dino was working the late shift, he would arrive home tired, his police uniform shirt slung over his shoulder, and clear his throat until Behr woke up.

“How are they ever going to learn self-control if you keep letting them do whatever they want?” Dino would ask as he stowed his gear and tossed his shirt in with the other laundry.

“What am I supposed to do? They wait until I fall asleep,” Behr would protest to no avail. Dino would shake his head and try to hide his smile.

Behr closed his eyes as he remembered that smile. He’d almost reached a stage where he could think of Dino and not cry, not dissolve into a morose, snivelling mess.

“How was your day?” Dino would ask when he returned naked from the shower. Behr was always amazed that, even after ten years together, the sight of a naked Dino could still fill his mind with the most lascivious and impure thoughts.

“It was fine,” Behr would respond as he watched Dino guide the dogs into the living room and then shut the door. “And I see it’s about to get a little better.”

Dino would laugh and return to the bed, strip off the duvet and the sheet, and then free Behr from his T-shirt and boxers. Behr would watch as Dino lowered himself, aligning their bodies perfectly. “I missed you today,” Dino would whisper as he began to kiss his way from lips to ears and back again. “I thought about these lips, these eyes, this body. I’ve been waiting all day to hear you whisper my name.”

“Dino, please.” Behr would pull his knees up so Dino could work his way between them. It never seemed to matter what was going on in Behr’s life. If Dino whispered in his ear or touched him with that gentle caress, Behr’s mind could only focus on one thing—giving himself completely to him.

One of the dogs barked, and Behr opened his eyes and saw the cracked paint of the coffered ceiling once again. He’d never left the bedroom, but he still felt as if he’d been brought back to this place. This particular memory was much more vivid than the rest.

“What is it, Charlie?” Behr threw off the sheet and moved to the window. Charlie was still on the bed, but something beyond the window had caught his attention. “What?” Behr repeated as he looked out. He didn’t see anything out of the ordinary, but then he didn’t know what ordinary was for this neighborhood—or town, or province for that matter.

“Lucy? Did you hear anything?” Charlie’s sister raised her head slightly, yawned, and put her head back on the pillow.

Behr stretched his back and then walked to the closet, pulled his jeans off the shelf, and put them on. He stuffed his feet into sneakers and laced them up, then shrugged into Dino’s favorite hoodie.

“Walk?”

Charlie and Lucy bounded off the bed and made their way to the front door, leaving Behr to grope his way, alone, through the dark halls and down the unfamiliar stairway.

“Hang on,” Behr said to them as he headed away from the front door and toward the kitchen. “I think I saw coffee last night.” The dogs followed him and sat while he looked through the first two cupboards until he found a new jar of instant coffee. “Close enough,” he sighed and looked for a kettle. When he couldn’t locate one, he looked for a pot so he could boil the water. No pots or pans of any kind. “Jesus, Smith, what the fuck?” He ran his hands over his short red hair and patted his back pocket to make sure he had his wallet. “This is Canada,” he said to the dogs. “There’s got to be a Tim Hortons somewhere nearby. Right?” Charlie looked at Lucy, who offered only another yawn.

Behr pushed his hands forward, giving Charlie and Lucy the signal to head to the door, where he put on their harnesses. He patted the front left pocket of his jeans and felt the keychain. Once the three of them were on the other side, he locked the door.

“Okay, babies,” Behr said as he smelled the salt in the air. It had been a while since he’d been anywhere near an ocean. “Let’s see what we can learn about our new hometown.”

Taking note of street names as well as the direction they were headed, Behr led the dogs down one sidewalk after another. He noted which streets led to dead ends and which led back, eventually, to Central, the main street bisecting the town. If he traveled north from his home, he would find the grocery store, as well as the other businesses that he would soon frequent. There was the veterinarian’s office two streets over, just down the street from the electronics store. He made a mental note to head there as soon as possible and purchase surveillance cameras as well as a few other items Agent Smith had encouraged him to buy for added security.

If he traveled south, there was a river he assumed would lead to the ocean. He’d only noted one bridge but assumed there would probably be another if he kept walking long enough. As he walked away from the bridge, heading north, he made another mental note to see what was on the other side of the river. He soon found himself in an industrial area, populated with an auto repair shop and two other businesses that looked like they might be abandoned. He took a left on a dirt road and timed how long it would take him to get back to Central Street.

It took him six minutes, and he saw he was three blocks down from an electronics store. He continued to build a mental map of the town and wondered if the grocery store would have any maps.

Charlie and Lucy started pulling on their leads, and Behr noticed they were near a park. He let himself be pulled toward it and realized it was actually the athletic field of the local high school. The dogs guided him through the gate, and he unhooked their leads and let them run and play with each other. His mind conjured more memories of his time with Dino.

He thought of the hours spent walking the dogs, playing with them in the local park off Henderson Avenue back in Winnipeg. They would pass the hours with Charlie and Lucy in that park, throwing Frisbees or tennis balls, or just sitting in the grass talking to each other while the pups took a nap. It was in that park, after dating for almost a year, that Dino asked Behr to marry him. It had been a year filled with revelations. When he found himself recognizing that he was in  love with Dino, Behr had had to tell him all about his brother and father and their criminal activities. This particular bit of information would invariably be a source of embarrassment for Dino.

Dino had only shrugged and explained that no family was perfect, and they would get through it somehow. Nine months later Dino and Behr were in the park again, and the sun was beginning to dip below the horizon when Dino took out a simple gold band and offered it—and his heart—to Behr.

“Morning.”

Behr turned quickly at the sound of the bass voice. It took him a moment to register the tall, well-built man who was about twenty feet from him. Dressed in running shorts and a plain white T-shirt, the man crouched and began petting Charlie and Lucy, who were quite eager to meet a new friend. Behr took a deep breath and tried to reassure himself that nothing bad was going to happen. “Morning.”

“Beautiful dogs,” the stranger said, standing to reveal that he was well over six feet tall.

Behr didn’t move. If the man meant him harm, he would have to reveal himself by making the first move. “Thank you.”

“I’m Sal,” the stranger said, taking a few steps forward, the dogs following along

“Charlie, Lucy, come,” Behr commanded. They did as ordered, and Behr hooked the leads. “Enjoy your day,” he said, turning back to the gate.

“You too.”

Behr’s heart was racing so fast, he thought he was having a stroke or a heart attack. As he alternated between running and walking back to his new house, the panic attack subsided with each meter of distance he put between himself and the tall, powerfully built stranger. As his mind cleared, and he was reassured there was no danger, Behr wondered if he’d overreacted because he’d been caught off guard or because the stranger reminded him so much of Dino.

Ridiculous, he thought as he got the dogs and himself back inside the house. Probably all that thinking of Dino that’s making you think that. Either way, Behr would have to ensure he was more attentive on his walks from now on. At least he doesn’t know where you live. Behr ran to the kitchen, filled a mug with hot water from the tap, and shoved in a few tablespoons of instant coffee.

Chapter TWO

One of the oldest human needs is having someone to wonder where you are

when you don’t come home at night. (Margaret Mead)

 

Salvatore Terranova stripped off his T-shirt, wiped his brow, and stuffed the sweat-soaked shirt in his back pocket. He was still thinking about the tall redhead he’d met in the high school athletic field that morning. The way the man looked as if he’d been caught doing something illegal. The way he had blushed so deeply, as if he’d been thinking the same thing as Sal. He’d wanted to ask him if he was just visiting or if he was the new homeowner down the street, but the man hadn’t given his name, so Sal left him alone. He’d finished his run, unable to focus on anything but the way the man’s long legs and perfect butt had looked in those faded jeans. Sal took a shower and thought of the man while he sought release. Then he took a nap for a couple of hours before attacking his to-do list for the day.

He took the wire brush in hand, bent over the lawn mower again, cleaned the blades thoroughly, and put the machine back in the garage. He stretched his back a few times and thought about getting something to eat before weeding the backyard. He decided to give the flowers some water and was not too upset that he’d have to wait until they were dry to weed the beds. After watering the flowers, and maybe the lawn, he’d find something to eat. He still had some leftovers from Joe’s birthday party the other night. In fact, as the only unmarried sibling in his rather large Italian family, he had a fridge full of leftovers. With six brothers and four sisters, all happily married and with at least two kids each, Sal would never be able to complain that he was alone. But he was lonely.

Sal had never had any problems meeting men when he lived in Charlottetown all those years before, but he’d never found one who shared his dream of moving back to Montague, and living simply and peacefully, surrounded by family and friends. The men he’d met who were his own age seemed interested only in clothes, working out, and clothing-optional vacations. So Sal had moved back on his own.

He couldn’t honestly complain about his life in Montague. He’d been born and raised near here, in the next town, and had nothing but wonderful childhood memories. He was always at peace when he spent time with his brothers or sisters, but especially when he spent time with any of his fifteen nieces and ten nephews. Some of them were in university now, and some were just learning to walk. It didn’t matter to Sal how old they were, they were all precious to him. He’d been there for each of them whenever they needed him. Help with school work, money for university, even a place to stay because they were fighting with their parents. It didn’t matter to Sal what they wanted from him. If he could give it, he would.

During his more optimistic days in Charlottetown, he’d thought he would not only meet the man who would fall head-over-heels in love with him, but also share his dream of one day adopting a few children. But reality had set in soon enough, and Sal realized he would be lucky to get away from his circle of friends without turning out like them.

He was curling the hose up, already thinking about finishing off his mother’s spaghetti, when he heard a car horn. He recognized his brother’s car right away. He waved as Joe pulled into the driveway of the old Victorian down the street. He dropped the hose and decided to go over and visit with his oldest brother for a bit. Maybe he’d even get to meet the new owner.

It was a welcome bit of news that Joe had finally been able to sell that old house. Mrs. MacDonald, the previous occupant, had died a few years back, and her daughter instructed Joe to take any reasonable offer that came along. Joe, ever the optimist, had been certain he would sell it within the year, but it ended up taking almost three.

“Hey, Joe.” Sal held out his hand as he walked up to his brother.

“Ciao,” Joe said, shaking his brother’s hand. Then he removed the sign from the lawn and stowed it in his truck.

“I was just going to have some of Ma’s spaghetti. You wanna join me?”

“Can’t, baby brother.” Joe closed the trunk and moved to the passenger side, opened the door, and retrieved his briefcase. “New owner’s here, and I need to get a few signatures. Then Jinny and I are having a date night.”

“No problem. You need me to look after the kids?”

“No, Ma and Pop are picking them up and taking ’em to a movie.”

Sal opened his mouth to tell his brother that maybe he’d tag along for fun, but then the front door opened. Sal looked at the long legs, red hair, and flushed cheeks and suddenly felt chilly. The man was peeling white tape off his fingers and had obviously worked up a sweat. His dark blue T-shirt was stained under the pectoral muscles and arms. Sal figured the man had been working out, boxing maybe. Sal pulled his T-shirt out of his back pocket and pulled it on, trying to get warm, but it was still too damp to have the desired effect.

The redhead descended the steps, his face completely transformed by the smile he offered Joe. They shook hands and exchanged pleasantries. Sal moved a little closer. The man’s name is Bear? What kind of name is that?

“Sal?”

Sal heard his name, but he couldn’t take his eyes off that freckled skin—beautiful pink skin, flawless except for the concentration of freckles across the bridge of the nose and each cheek. “Huh?”

“Sal is my baby brother,” Joe was saying. “Sal? This is Behr. Your new neighbor.”

“Behr,” Sal whispered to himself before taking the man’s hand in his. “Nice to meet you, Behr.”

“Thank you,” Behr said, his cheeks flushing. “I owe you an apology.”

“What did he do?” Joe asked Behr before turning to Sal. “What did you do?”

“No, it’s nothing,” Behr said, raising his hands to reassure Joe. “I was out early this morning walking Charlie and Lucy, and Sal caught me daydreaming. I left rather abruptly, I’m afraid. I apologize.” Behr offered his hand.

“No. ’S okay.” Sal heard the jumble of syllables and closed his eyes. He felt a slight squeeze on his hand and opened his eyes. “I shouldn’t have snuck up on you like that.”

“Well,” Joe said as Sal finally released Behr’s hand. “Shall we take care of this paperwork?”

“Yes, please. Come in.”

Sal advanced, intent on accepting the offer, but Joe put a hand on his chest. “Not you.”

“That’s okay,” Behr said.

Sal offered a grin to his brother and followed them into the house. The first thing he noticed was how Charlie and Lucy came over to him right away. “Hey, there,” he cooed as he got down on one knee to pet the dogs. “You remember me?” Behr and Joe made their way into the kitchen, Sal assumed to find a better and taller surface on which to sign all the papers. He stayed where he was and sat cross-legged on the scuffed hardwood floors, wondering if he should invite Behr over for dinner. The house was completely empty, so he assumed he probably didn’t have a stocked kitchen either. He was looking for the dogs’ tags when he heard his brother’s voice getting louder.

“Jim McLeod is a local contractor. A good man, too. He does good work. You let him know that I gave you his name, and he’ll be more than happy to come out and take a look.”

Joe led Behr back to the front door, offering other names of people who could help him get the house just the way he wanted it.

“I’ll be sure to call him, then.”

“I’m pretty good with tools,” Sal said and pointed to his brother. “Speaking of tools.” Behr’s face broke into a broad smile and Sal’s heart skipped a beat. That is one beautiful man. His brother punched him.

“If there’s anything you need, you let me know.” Joe said, placing a hand on his brother’s shoulder. “Pest control, for example.”

Sal pushed Joe’s hand away and stood up. “I’ve got a fridge full of leftovers,” he said, immediately feeling foolish. “I mean, I don’t know if you managed to get to the store, or, you know.”

“Smooth,” Joe whispered as he waved at Behr. “It was nice to finally meet you, Behr. Don’t hesitate to call if there’s anything I can do.”

“Thank you,” Behr said, moving closer to the dogs—and Sal.

“Come on, little brother.” Joe grabbed some hair on Sal’s forearm and pulled. “Let’s leave the man alone.”

“Seriously,” Sal said, pulling away from Joe’s reach. “I’d be more than happy to help you. And I do have a fridge full of leftovers.”

“Well, I, uh….”

Sal saw the look on Behr’s face and wondered if he was scared or just annoyed. “Sorry,” Sal said finally, turning to leave. “Thought I’d be neighborly.”

“As long as it’s no trouble,” Behr said as he squatted to pet the dogs.

“None at all,” Sal said, feeling a little hope. “Beats eating alone, right?” Okay. There it is. What a pathetic thing to say. That’s probably why he has that look on his face.

“Unless that’s what he wants,” Joe said and offered one last wave before heading back out to his car.

“Okay, I’m going to go before you take out a restraining order. Sorry.”

“No, please,” Behr said and put a hand on Sal’s forearm. His fingers were long and slender, and Sal wondered what they’d feel like combing through the thick hair on his chest. “I was just going to make some pasta and then take the dogs out for a walk.”

“Or you could come over to my house and have my ma’s spaghetti, maybe a glass of wine or beer or water….” Sal stopped and offered his hand again. “I’ll have dinner ready in an hour, if you’re interested. And I promise to smell a lot better.”

Behr laughed again. “I bought some ice cream this morning. I’ll bring that for dessert, if you’d like?”

“Sure,” Sal said with a nod and then pointed to the dogs. “I’ll be disappointed if you don’t bring Charlie and Lucy.” He winked at Behr and turned to go. “Oh,” he said, turning back to see Behr still smiling. “Very clever, by the way. I love Peanuts. My favorite is Snoopy. I’ll see you in about an hour?” Behr nodded, and Sal practically ran back to his house to clean, cook, and shower.

 

 

As he stood in front of the fan over the stove, Sal lifted his shirt and closed his eyes, praying Behr wouldn’t arrive until after he stopped sweating. He’d been running around like a maniac for the past hour trying to get everything ready for his first date in years. This was what he missed about dating. This inexplicable mixture of optimism and reality that had him imagining starting every sentence with “We” or spending hours on the phone trying to coordinate holiday times with his family and his in-laws. It was a silly little habit, but Sal was nothing if not a silly optimist. Even when the inevitable reality of a break-up or ignored phone calls told him otherwise, Sal didn’t like to throw in the towel until there was no denying it was truly over.

He was completely dry by the time he heard the doorbell. He checked his hair in the hallway mirror and smiled when he opened the door and saw Behr with a litre of ice cream, Charlie and Lucy sitting obediently at his side. “Ben and Jerry’s,” Sal said as he stood aside. “Please.” He motioned for Behr to enter. “Thank you,” Sal said as Behr handed him the ice cream.

“I’m sorry it’s only vanilla, but I don’t have much of a sweet tooth. I actually bought it for Charlie and Lucy. They love vanilla ice cream.”

“Well, then we’ll make sure they get first crack at it.” Sal saw Behr open his mouth to protest, his brow furrowed, but held up a hand. “They’ll enjoy it more than me, I’m sure. I’m afraid I don’t have much of a sweet tooth either. My only weakness is bread. And by only, I mean there are others I don’t admit to.” Behr laughed and rubbed his hands together, seeming uncertain as to what to do with them. Sal was comforted by the thought that Behr might be as nervous as he was.

“I’ve been using that word incorrectly all these years then.”

“Please, come through to the kitchen. This way.” Sal walked ahead, followed by Behr and the dogs. “I managed to find two big bowls for Charlie and Lucy so they can join us for dinner.”

“If you feed them, you’ll never be able to get rid of them.”

“Ma says the same thing about me,” Sal said as he took two bowls off the counter. “These are for water,” he explained as he set them on the floor near the fridge, grabbed a jug, and filled them with filtered water. He laughed out loud as the dogs sauntered over and began lapping it up immediately. “And these,” he said, pulling out two large mixing bowls from the cupboard above the sink. “These we can fill with whatever you’ll permit them to eat. Do you allow them to have pasta?”

“As long as it’s just pasta, sure. No sauce. But I try and limit how much people food I let them eat. The only serious thing to watch for is any possible allergies to wheat or gluten.” Behr felt himself falling back into the old habit of answering animal questions. He had to catch himself as his mind started organizing a list of safer alternatives, as if Sal were a client and Behr were back at the clinic. “A little bit of pasta and a little bit of ice cream would be okay, I guess.”

“Okay. Sounds good.” Sal put the bowls on the counter and opened the fridge, careful to avoid hitting the dogs. “Wine? Beer?”

“Actually, I’ll take a glass of water, if you don’t mind?”

“Of course not,” Sal said. He reached in to retrieve a bottle of water and handed it to Behr. “I thought maybe we could sit out on the back deck for a little bit.”

“Okay.”

Sal pointed to the dogs. “Should we bring them, or will they find us eventually?”

“If we don’t bring them, they’ll snoop through every room in the house.”

“That’s fine. I haven’t had a dog in a while, but I seem to remember investigating the unknown is a lot of fun for them.”

“Oh, yes. These two are very curious,” Behr said as he followed Sal. “But if I were you, I would close bedroom and bathroom doors. Otherwise they’ll find anything and everything, whether you think it’s well hidden or not.”

“Thanks for the tip,” Sal said as he motioned to the opposite end of the living room. “If you go to the other end of the sofa and take a right, you’ll see the French doors that lead from the study to the deck.”

Behr nodded and followed Sal’s directions while Sal shut the bedroom and bathroom doors. It left Charlie and Lucy with only kitchen, the living room, the study, and the basement, but Sal figured they’d be happy enough with that. As he hurried to catch up with Behr, Sal wondered if he still had Ginger’s box of toys. She’d been gone for almost eighteen months, but he’d never been able to throw them out. He seemed to remember it being in the basement. He thought briefly about getting it, but then figured it was something they could do after dinner.

Sal walked outside to find Behr standing at the railing as he watched Charlie and Lucy jump and play on the grass. Sal stood beside him.

“How old are they?”

“They’re both ten. They’ll be eleven in another couple of months.”

“They’re gorgeous. Magnificent coats.”

“Thank you. They’re brother and sister.”

“Have you had them since they were pups?”

“Almost,” Behr said, looking briefly at Sal. “They were rescued from a pretty bad situation. I didn’t have the heart to tell him no.”

“Him?”

“Sorry, a friend who suggested I adopt them.”

Sal thought that was a little odd, the way Behr had just said “him,” as if the reference wouldn’t need explaining. “Now, I can tell from your accent that you’re not from the Maritimes, so where did you actually adopt them?”

“B.C.,” Behr said as he turned away from the setting sun and sat on one of the deck chairs. “Tofino.”

“Westerner, huh?” Sal took the seat beside Behr’s. “I’ve only ever seen pictures until now. Thought you lot were something parents made up to scare their kids.”

“Stop that,” Behr said, laughing. “We’re not that bad. I’m giving you a fair chance, even though it’s a fact that you dye the sand red to match Anne’s hair.”

Sal laughed, prompting the dogs to investigate. “The sand is red from all the iron.”

“And your provincial flower is a potato,” Behr said with a smirk.

“And what’s yours? A bong?”

Both men laughed as the dogs looked from one to the other, as if confused by the noise.

“I guess we do have that reputation, don’t we?” Behr said, referring to the stereotype among Canadians that British Columbia was populated by nothing but pot-smoking hippies.

“It doesn’t matter,” Sal said after a moment, reaching out to pet Charlie. “Now, as for Prince Edward Island’s fondness for redheads? Well, that just proves we’ve got excellent taste.” He looked at Behr. His heart fluttered when a blush creeped across those freckled cheeks. Sal was wondering why, in a province filled with more than its share of redheads, he was so attracted to this particular one. Behr looked away. If I’ve ever seen anything so enticing, it was so long ago, I’ve completely forgotten about it.

---

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